This time

This time I’m not scared.
This time, I’m not going to replace the butterflies in the stomach with intoxicants.
They have churned in for so long and made me bitter.
This time I’m not going to let anyone, anyone take what I deserve from me.
I have done that for so long and have been at the bottom.
This time I’m going to put leashes on my demons.
I haven’t done that in a long time and my halo had been jagged with their claws.
This time, I’m not scared of love.
This time, I won’t run from it.

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